Space & Time

My life has always been busy. Well, that may be an understatement. Most people closest to me know that my life is packed to the brim with plans, events, work, kids, and just life stuff. My life is fun that’s for sure, but something I am learning is that there is an opportunity cost for all this stuff I am constantly doing. I am finding that all this “doing” is crowding out the mental space I need to recharge and access my creativity and motivation that got me fired up to achieve the big picture stuff in the first place.

We all do it… get excited about something new, start working on it and then when things get hard to manage, or the newness wears off we let it slip and then a few months later at a party a friend will ask “what ever happened with that blog you started [marathon you were training for, diet plan you were on, project you were so excited about—insert your thing here]?”… You tell them you just “got busy” and change the subject. And they understand and let you off the hook because they have been there too. Meanwhile in the back of your mind your self talk and guilt are eating you alive. Then rather than refocusing on it and getting back to work, you completely blow it off out of resentment for failing at yet one more thing.

It’s incredible to me how quickly that fire you had for that new and big thing can dwindle. It is a battle to show up and still want it every day when it would be so much easier to just relax and watch TV. It is important to know how to motivate yourself and be able to light yourself up again to keep gaining traction especially when it’s boring, or hard, or when the waiting game is what you have to play right now. This is the hardest time because you kind of don’t even want to… So how do you do that? Great question… I am still working on it. I have tried the trick where you write down every detail exactly as you see it during an immersive visualization exercise. Then you look back at it to remind you of what your why is… This is great at showing me the end game but doesn’t always reignite that fire when I am exhausted. I thought I was doing it wrong. Guess what… I was. I mean, I am!

What I am finding is that you need to create space for yourself. Thinking time, reflection time, prayer time and time to create. You can read your why statement 1000 times but if you cannot remember how you felt or have enough time and space to relive the feeling that got you there, you will not get back there. The only thing that is actually different for me between now and a few months ago is my mental space and the priority I have allowed my plan to take in my life. I am still waking up at 5 am every day, but rather than taking the time I set for myself to do the things I want, I have allowed the things I am stressed out about to take over that time. My morning time has become all about just going through the motions. No more. I need to show up for myself first before I can truly show up for anyone else in a way worth doing.

Today marks day one of my recommitment to myself and what I want. No more going through the motions. Mornings are my rest and recharge time. Writing, editing, and growing… these things are life-giving to me and I must give them the intentionality they deserve if I am ever to become who and what I want to be and create!

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